fungible social status

frogmistress and I have been bemoaning the fact that "we don't know enough freaks".

Some on my friend list here have been having some similar problems.

One has stated recently that some of her "friends" find her boring now that she has a career. That she has sold out.

A big part of the "freak" crowd is college students, ok they have a good reason to be poor. Another section of "out freaks" is un-or-under employed folk that can be obviously freaky because they do not have to fear losing their jobs. There is a small minority in this last group that has some hostility towards those of us with different priorities.

It is getting harder to hang around with college age freaks without me feeling like a dirty-old man.

Now, I have done the "pop corn" as a dietary staple before. It wasn't fun.

Being poor shouldn't give anyone credibility in and of it's self.

Having money does garner one credibility in their ability to game the system. This can be accomplished via skill, luck or heredity. The system doesn't care which way. Most people don't really care either, they are more interested in the trappings of success than the person.

I have no problem with admitting that my personal income can be attributed to luck, heredity and skill in that order.

Luck: Being born in the US. We are the top rung of "quality of life" on this little blue pebble. It is quite disgusting the luxury that we live in when you put it in the context of all of humanity.

Heredity: Being born white & male stacks the deck for you as about as good as it gets (here in the US). Middle class parents in a middle class suburb are icing on this cake.

Skill: My brain works fairly well. And I'm not afraid to use it. I see so many people that go to great lengths to nothave to figure something out. Just being willing to do this should guarantee one at least a $30K USD salary.

I did get to a place where I got tired of paying for dinner for our friends and acquaintances so I could eat at a restaurant that had food that I was willing to spend my caloric intake limits on.

Yes, it got worse when I started limiting my calories. If I'm only going to be eating 800 calories for dinner, they better be tasty!

Don't get me wrong I don't mind doing it, it just got tiring. I would rather pay for a companion's meal than eat something I don't like or go without their conversation.

One of my other LJ friends quotes is: "I've gotten to a place in my life where competence is an aphrodisiac."

One thing that I have found myself doing while moving into the more flush social circles is to edit down my "freak" qualities. I haven't "changed", but I don't dress as oddly as I am wont to and don't inform people that "their opinion is totally disengaged from reality" as often as I should.

Some of this can be attributed to learning a different set of social cues and paradigms. Some has to do with unrelated, but concurrent, personal and health changes.

In some situations I have been surprised how 'kinked' the straights can be. They can eclipse the freaks! As long as they stay in the societally approved bounds of 'straight' they can up the amplitude of their kink to much higher levels than what most freaks would do.

I have found that it is important to make sure that the straights know that you don't disapprove of them. Kind of a odd thought for me, coming from outside as it were. But being the social majority doesn't grant them any self esteem on an individual basis.

Navigating any social situation is all about respecting other sentients for what they bring to the table. Not how well funded their wardrobe is.

Alternate view of the situation: You don't have to justify who you want to be friends with, even to yourself. If they add to your life, hold them dear. If they do not, let them be.

Who knows maybe we will find other freaks that are cloistered by their affluence. Freak mason rings or secret handshakes would be great!